Thursday Thoughts

Hi friends, I just got caught up with the journals, I am pretty sure I am getting my alerts now hopefully, with Aol it's one thing after the other seriously.I am so sorry to hear that so many of my J-land friends are having a hard time right now, I just want to gather you all in my arms and hug you all and tell you that 'Everything will be ok" I am praying for all of you that need prayers and if there is anything I can ever do for you guys let me know ok, Work was busy today, I was running around like a crazy lady and Anthony looked so handsome today in the grey sweater he had on, Robert came in the back and said that Anthony, Cheryl, Robin and himself decided that I deserved a $ 50 dollar World Market gifcard for doing such a good job getting the emails, that was so freaking nice, I swear I almost cried.I am wondering why the CSI tonight is a repeat and maybe it's just me personally , but I do'nt really like that episode much Toe Tags  that is on tonight, at least next week's CSI is a new one-yea !!!!!!!!!!!! I would like to welcome a new friend to my journal-Emmi !!!!!!!! Welcome Emmi :) I love meeting new friends, hope you all have a good Friday, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

I am fed up with Aohell !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi friends, I am really fed up with Aol, I am not getting my alerts again and I am so pissed !!!!!!!!!!! So if for some reason any of you update your journals and I do'nt leave any of you a comment it will be because once again I am not getting them, Have any of you been having problems with your alerts too ????????? Ugh I am so tired of not getting my alerts, It is still really cold here , I am bundled up in sweats and thick socks, One of my online friends said today in her journal she already sent all her Christmas cards out today, wow I am inspired to start mine this coming weekend, I am working a long day tommorow and I looked online and CSI is a repeat tommorow night from this season, the episode where the dead bodies were talking to each other in the morgue, I guess I will watch it anyway.I miss Without a Trace not being on Thursday nights anymore,I think Without a Trace is a really great show as well as CSI, last Sunday I completely forgot it was on on Sunday night and I missed it, Lisa Jo was it a good episode ??????? Hope you all have a good Thursday, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Tuesday Musings

Hi friends, I went to the dentist today and she confirmed indeed I need a root canal-ugh !!!!!! I should have know but seriously as I told a friend of mine tonight I have'nt felt well since I had this tooth filled that time.Maybe after the root canal I will feel better again hopefully.The air is still really frosty here, anyone want some hot chocolate? Anyhow I hope you all enjoyed your Tuesday , I was supposed to work today but I had that appt today and I was'nt sure if the root canal was going to be done today but I will have it done in a week because I am sick of the tooth pain and sensitivity from the filled tooth.I miss my friends at work but I am working 8 hours Thursday and working Friday and Saturday too, Have a good Wednesday everyone, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Monday Thoughts

Hi friends, this is my second attempt writing this entry,  by the way my alerts are'nt working again, sigh............I enjoyed my day off today, I went to go see the movie Bobby with my mom, OMG it was really good, I highly reccomend this movie to all of you , but I was in tears towards the end, but wow what a movie !!!!!!! Well as it turns out I will need to get a root canal after all-that tooth is still bothering me and even if I drink some water that is room-temperature it tingles so I guess as my dentist put it "The tooth is dead" a common thing sometimes that happens after you get a cavity filled so back to the dentist I will go tommorow morning-ugh wish me luck you guys ok, I bought more Christmas cards at my stores so by all means any of you that would like a Christmas card who I do'nt have your address yet feel free to email it to me, it's been really cold here this week and it will be really cold for the whole week, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO By the way I am craving chocolate big time, anyone got any smores ? :)

My new favorite website

Hi friends , here is my new favorite website www.photostamps.com

also this restaurant is my favorite, go to the website and type in your zip code and see if you have one near you, this is where I went for Thanksgiving www.mimiscafe.com the food here is delicious !!!!!!!!!! Love You All Lisa XO

My Day Today

Hi friends, I worked an 8 hour day today, and OMG what a zoo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I could'nt believe how crowded my store was today, it was unbelievable.Now I did'nt have any rude customers today like I was expecting but there were alot of annoying things that happened.The first annoying thing was we had a buy one, get one free sale going on yesterday and today on all the Christmas ornaments, holiday gift wraps, Christmas cards, and assorted Christmas candles.The things besides the ornaments were no problem to scan but the freaking Christmas ornaments were a nightmare because if a person was buying a whole bunch of them at once which more then person did I had to scan each set of them as a separate transaction and when you have a huge line it can really suck !!!!!!!!!!!!! Ugh I was so not having it !!!!!!! Ok and then when my other cashier in back with me Shenee went to lunch I got a huge line and when I tried to call for a back -up cashier my phone was not working-Somebody's phone was off the hook-Freaking great !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was so desperate I called one of the new guys over who was putting some go-backs away and said "Trevor can you do me a huge favor and tell Robert I need another cashier " Bless his heart , he is such a sweet kid, Robert came running back a second later and found out where the culprit phone was.Trevor came in the back to help us ring as well.I like him so much, I 'm going to talk Anthony into keeping Trevor permanately - he is a keeper !!!!!!!!  I hope you all had a good Saturday, thank God the Christmas ornament thing ended today, and thank God I am off for the next two days, Hope you all have a good Sunday, Love You All Lisa XO

Question ????????????????

Hi friends, there was something I was wondering about, now when I go into work today and if somebody man or woman decides to treat me bad or be rude would it be out of line to look at them and say "Wow you probably would'nt treat your own children or grandchildren like that now would you? " It would be fun to shock them if anything Please let me know what you guys think, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Tommorow the fun begins ....................................

Hi friends, hope you all had a good turkey day yesterday.Tomorrow I will be back at work , poor Lisa Jo after reading her entry for today I just want to give her the biggest hug ever !!!!!!! This is the time of the year more then any other I dread working at my store, when I see the ugliness of some people come out, I see how truly ugly some people can be and it is very unsettling indeed.Sometimes I do'nt think I am strong enough to work during the Christmas season, I just want to run away and hibernate until January 1'st.I am dreading tommorow and probably every day working after it, do'nt get me wrong, I am thankful I have a job and also thankful I have such a wonderful manager as Anthony , but I wish alot of the customers did'nt have to make my job so much harder by being rude, impatient, etc .................

I will probably have some stories to tell you guys when I get home from work tommorow night, I bet poor Anthony came in to work at 6:00 a.m.today since we opened at 7:00 -God help me get through the whole month of December-I love you all and Hugs Lisa XO

Am I the only one who thinks this story does'nt add up??????

Ok I read about the Aol news story earlier about  George Bush's daughter Barbara 's purse being stolen and I admit I am not really a Bush fan and I had a little chuckle over the whole thing, because the story just seemed so weird.I mean it said in the story a thief snuck underneath the table and stole her purse, now tell me how does somebody sneak under a table without anybody seeing them or feeling them brush up against them????????? The whole thing seems a little fishy to me .Do any of you guys think this story just seemed weird too ???????

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone

Hi friends, I just wanted to wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving, I hope you all know how much you mean to me and I hope you all enjoy your day tommorow, Do'nt forget for those of you that are fellow CSI fans there is a new episode on tommorow night !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Looks like rain out but I do'nt mind, Thank you all of you that sent me E-cards -I loved them !!!!!!!!!!! Have a great day tommorow, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Guess Who Sent Me An Autographed Picture ?

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Tuesday.I had today off so I made a trip to Costco to pick up a few things.I love shopping there, it was'nt too bad in there today, tommorow will be much worse !!!!!! Rain is supposed to be coming back either tommorow or Thursday -Nordstrom sent me a $ 40 dollar certificate in the mail -I might make use of it tommorow but that was'nt the most exciting thing I got in the mall, There was a big tan envelope in my mailbox when I looked and the return address was Hollywood, no way I thought , but when I carefully opened it there was an autographed picture from Jorja !!!!!!!!! Wow talk about my day being made I did'nt think it was possible to love Jorja any more, but now I do, lol.I did'nt think she even got my letter that time, I wrote to her almost a year and a half ago , but she is on a # 1 rated show so I can understand that Jorja is probably really busy !!!!!!! I wish all of you a safe and wonderful Thanksgiving, I will be going to Mimi's Cafe with my mom and brother Thanksgiving, no dishes to do up later, yea !!!!!!!!!! Oh by the way Lisa Jo your man is on the cover of People magazine this week, pick that issue up if you have'nt already, Have a good Wednesday tommorow everyone, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Monday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Monday.Work was good today,Anthony was opening today and Cheryl was back working today , but she was in a decent mood today and I even suggested a good restaurant for her and her boyfriend to go to for Thanksgiving. I got 15 people to sign up for our emails and Anthony was really happy about that.I still do'nt understand why Cyndie made up our schedule for this week but oh well.I would like to thank two awesome friends for sending me Thanksgiving E cards- thank you Jackie and thank you Mandy !!!!!!!! You guys are so sweet and thoughtful.I ca'nt believe Thanksgiving is this coming Thursday-OMG it came really fast !!!!!!!! I would like to welcome my awesome friend Angela aka Pookyluvsyou back to J-land .Welcome back Angela -I missed you friend !!!!!!!!!!! I am so thankful for my J-land friends.You guys mean so much to me !!!!!!! Hope you all have a good Tuesday,looks like the rain wants to come back again here,  I'm going to make a trip to Costco tommorow, pray it wo'nt be nuts there, I love you all and Hugs Lisa XO

Sunday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a decent Sunday.I woke up early and went out on my balcony and there was a rowing contest going on, there were tons of people rowing in the lagoon below in kayaks, I got some really cool pictures of them.It looked like it was going to rain all day here , but it never did. I think the rain is holding out for tommorow, I got some snail-mail pictures of me developed today at Long's I will sending out in my Christmas cards this year, I am really happy I did that tonight, all of the stores after Thanksgiving are going to be a nightmare, including mine !!!!!!!! I have had this headache all day which is starting to be a pain , so I am going to look around and get some Gatorade for it.Lisa Jo was going to take her beautiful daughter Megan out for her birthday dinner tonight, I hope they all had an awesome time.Tommorow it will be back at work for me again, I guess I am ready to go back to work, so happy I wo'nt be working Friday, thrilled beyond belief actually is a better choice of words , Anthony said something Friday about that Cyndie made up our work schedule this week, I was like thinking -uh since when does that damn bitch make up our work schedule?????? Anyhow I hope you all have a good week, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Saturday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Saturday.I left at 10:00 a.m. this morning to go catch the new James Bond movie with a friend When I was waiting in line for the theater to open a man was in front of me kissing his daughter on the cheek and I felt a pain in my heart I will never stop feeling sad about the way things are between my dad and me .The moviewas not bad actually, lots of action !!!!! I wish Jorja would be in a movie coming out soon, I think she gets overlooked alot and I hate it.I am trying to see every movie that Jorja has ever been in, although Memento made me cry so hard when I watched it.I am so proud of myself, I worked out for 45 minutes tonight, I have been working so much lately and then when I come home I just want to chill -out and not work out.My brother and I had fun last night at his birthday dinner-he loved the gift card !!!!!!! It was a nice evening, I went down to feed the ducks tonight and they loved the muffins and pie crusts I saved for them.Hope you all have a great Sunday, I love you all and Hugs Lisa XO

Friday Thoughts

Hi friends, I will be leaving shortly to meet my brother for his birthday dinner at Macaroni Grill , but I just wanted to do a quick journal update.OMG my store was sooooooooooooo busy today, I was in stress city , it was only me and Anthony available to ring in the back and I had to deal with some unsavory rude customers that I would have loved to bitch-slap.Anywho I looked at my schedule for next week and I am not scheduled to work the day after Thanksgiving-yeah I was shocked !!!!!!!!!! I was like what ???????? And then woo-hoo !!!!!!! I am really happy about that, that day is a freaking nightmare to work, let me tell you.I am loving my 6'th Season of CSI, if anything that will be my stress reliever to get me through the Christmas season, besides my nightly bubble baths, lol.I just made out my Christmas card list last night and  alot of you are on there, if there are any other friends who want to swap Christmas cards with me, please let me know, Hope you all have a great weekend, Happy birthday Derek and Happy Birthday also to Lisa Jo's beautiful daughter Megan !!!!!!!!!! Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Thursday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Thursday.Mine was good, I enjoyed my only day off this week, did laundry, worked out for an hour, wrote out some snail-mail cards, Anthony called me wanting me to come in earlier tommorow, I said "Sure why not" I love making him happy :) C.S.I. was pretty good tonight but I had one complaint, ok so like what was up with Jorja Fox only being on for like 5 minutes .Throughout the whole show I was like 'Ok where is Jorja?" I am glad she was on there tonight but I hope for the Thanksgiving episode of CSI next week Jorja has her usual spot.I ca'nt believe Thanksgiving is next Thursday night, OMG it came fast, I would like to wish my brother "Derek " a very Happy 20'th Birthday , but I will be seeing him after work tommorow.There is a beautiful girl who has a birthday also this weekend, Lisa Jo's beautiful daughter Megan will be 18 this weekend so "Happy Birthday to beautiful Megan too !!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope you all have a great Friday, I just put on some of my yummy Pecan Passion lotion from Bath and Body Works, I am obsessed with that store !!!!!!!!!!!! I love you all and Hugs Lisa XO

Wednesday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Wednesday.My store was really busy today, I think maybe because Macy's was having a huge sale today.I have noticed in the past two weeks we have been busier, I got 15 people to sign up for our emails today, not bad !!!!!!!! Are all of you guys ready for Thanksgiving? It is like a week away, I ca'nt believe it.I might go back to Alaska again in June, OMG I loved it there when I went in May, it was awesome, I am off work tommorow , but working again Friday, hope you all have a good Thursday, CSI night -woot !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My brother's birthday is Friday, I ca'nt believe it, I got a giftcard for Best Buy for $ 50 so he can get some awesome cds and DVD's , thanks for the suggestions, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Tuesday Thoughts

Hi friends, I just got home from work a little while ago.I had a pretty good day , it was busy today for a Tuesday and Thanksgiving is approaching fast.I had a strange encounter in my store today, I saw this blond woman who I had remembered seeing yesterday, she came up to me and clutched my hand and was asking me to look inside my heart and "Find God" She told me that he was watching over me, I was like "Uh ok" It made me think of Lisa Jo and her co-worker that was always asking her to go to church.I do believe in God and everything , but this lady seemed a little kooky, she was nice and everything but everyone has thier own beliefs.Anyhow I bought the 6'th Season of C.S.I. before work today-woot !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited to watch a couple of episodes later, I love the cover art on the 6'th Season !!!!!! Back to work for me again tommorow , I would like to welcome back my sweet friend Phil from his vacation, missed you Phil , glad to have you back !!!!!!!! My brother has a birthday coming up this week, I ca'nt believe it, he will be 20.I am not sure what to give him as a gift.Can any of you guys help me think of something for me to get him  ? Thank you , I love you all Lisa XO

Monday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Monday.Mine was ok , Anthony was opening today and it was nice to see him first thing in the morning .Funny how a dose of Anthony can make everything ok again, lol.Not to mention guess what comes out tommorow ???????? The 6'th Season of C.S.I. , OMG I feel like jumping up and down, lol .My shower is finally fixed too by the way-yea !!!!!!!! I bought some awesome Christmas cards in my store today so for those of you who I do'nt have your address yet please email it to me.My store is starting to get busier and I am getting a little nervous about working during the Christmas rush. Thank you all for your kind comments to me yesterday when I was feeling sad, I love you all so much and I am lucky to have such great friends in my life, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Another Fun Day

Hi friends, God was I depressed today.I have'nt been like this in ages, my mom and I fought all day, I just wanted to cry , but I did'nt.I just tried to stay out of her way, so much for a good weekend, lol.I had better be feeling a little better tommorow since I have to work, ugh I feel so crappy.I ca'nt be in this funk tommorow, I feel really sad today.I feel very much alone today , like I am on the outside looking in.I crave to be with a guy who loves me unconditionally who will hold my hand and be sensitive to my feelings.Is that too much to ask ? I called my friend Diane yesterday and she never called me back, she might be away though, usually she is good about calling me back.Sometimes I wish I could trade lives with my cat, he has it so good !!!!!!I wish I could see what it would be like for one day to be him, lol.Sometimes I think I am damaged as a person and I am too intense and emotional to be loved.I feel so empty inside tonight, could you all send some hugs my way ? Thanks for listening to my rant, I love you all Lisa XO

Saturday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Saturday.It was raining when I woke up today and a little chilly as well.It has stopped raining now and the air is really fresh and clean.I am finally getting my Aol alerts again, thank god !!!!!!!!!! I do'nt know what is up with Aol lately but I am getting fed up !!!!!!! Mr Red finally arrived which explains why I have been so tired and moody these past few days.I was pondering about cleaning out my closet and I finally did it.I feel proud of myself, :) I miss my friend Debbi , I wish she would come down here soon and visit, we used to have so much fun on weekends hanging out, I am trying to get into the holiday spirit, I am already seeing Christmas commercials, it's like uh Thanksgiving is first, lol.Hope you all have a good Sunday, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

What is the deal with Aol ????????????

Hi friends, I had a good day at work today.Anthony was opening yet again today so I got to enjoy him there .The store was really busy today  and today was a holiday too, Veteran's Day,  God Bless all the brave men who serve our country, and  Friends and Family Day in my store,as well  and I had to keep calling a service 30 which means another cashier to help me ring in the back.I checked my schedule for next week at work and I was phyched to see that my schedule is the same next week as it was this week and Cheryl aka the ice queen will be working overnight all next week too so I wo'nt have to deal with her !!!!!!!!!!!! Can you say Woo-hoo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not to mention Anthony is opening all next week again so I will see his beautiful eyes the first thing all next morning-hell yeah !!!!!!!!!!! I came home from work tonight to check my mail and read the new journal entries and I could'nt even access any of the journals or leave comments, seriously Aol what the hell ? Also once again I am not getting my alerts !!!!!!!! I was really pissed but I did have a really nice conversation online with my awesome friend Leene.OMG you guys the countdown for the release of the 6'th Season of C.S.I. is only 3 more days !!!!!!!! I am sooooooo excited to go buy it at Costco, speaking of C.S.I. wow was last night's episode on CBS great or what ????????? Rain is coming back tommorow but I am off for the weekend :) Hope you all have a great weekend , do something fun and enjoy yourselves, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

The Simple Pleasures in Life

Hi friends,  I wanted to write about the simple pleasures in life that make me smile.This afternoon I went down to feed the ducks again and I shared some of the pumpkin pie with them that I had left over.They loved it and I loved seeing them enjoy it.Walking in the fall leaves is a simple pleasure.Having Anthony smile at me when I come into work is a simple pleasure.Buying a great smelling lotion is a simple pleasure, right now my favorite lotion in the world is Bath and Body Works Pecan Passion lotion, OMG it smells heavenly and thier Heavenly Hot Chocolate one is wonderful too !!!!!!! Getting a snail -mail letter from a friend in the mail is a simple pleasure, I love getting snail-mail !!!!!!!! Going down by the water here and watching the pelicans play is a simple pleasure I love.Taking a great picture with my digital camera is a simple pleasure, now if I could figure out how to post them online for all of you to see !!!!!!!! Seeing my cat happy is a simple pleasure for me, I just bought him a new bed last night and he loves it !!!!!!!!! Wishing you all a day filled with at least 3 simple pleasures and I would also like to say a dear friend of mine in J-land has a birthday today, Happy Birthday Chris !!!!!!!!!!! Hope you have an awesome day filled with joy and good times !!!!!!!! I ca'nt wait till C.S.I.tonight, my favorite simple pleasure of all !!!!!!!!! I love you all and Hugs Lisa XO

Wednesday Thoughts

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Wednesday.I worked today and it was a pretty good day for the most part.Anthony was closing tonight, but he was there enough for me to drool over him today, lol.I am loving this week that Cheryl is working overnight.I ca'nt help but wonder if Anthony found out about her moodiness lately and scheduled her to work nights.Goes Hmmmmmmmmm? Anyhow the Friends and Family Days are starting tommorow at my store so we should be really busy, I am off tommorow but will be back at work Friday.I love being off on C.S.I. nights, I live for that show seriously, lol.I am counting down the days until the 6'th Season of C.S.I. comes out on DVD, only 5 more days !!!!!!!!!! Woo-hoo , I am really excited.If any of you would like a Christmas card from me and I do'nt have your address , feel free to email it to me so I will make sure you get a card.I am buying lots of them this year, lol.Hope you all have a good Thursday tommorow, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

My Tuesday

Hi friends, I just came home from work.Anthony was there today opening.It is really nice to have him opening this whole week.He looked really handsome in his crisp white shirt and khaki pants.He was standing right next to me and his cologne smelled really nice.By the way Cheryl this whole week is working overnights so she leaves right before I come into work.I love that !!!!!!!!! It was pretty busy today in my store for a Tuesday and I got 11 customers to sign up for our email.Not bad !!!!!! I ca'nt believe Thanksgiving is almost here , it came so fast !!!!!!!! Back at work for me tommorow, I love my schedule this week, By the way in the San Mateo Journal yesterday I thought this line in the Know It All section was interesting, it says "If the average person recieved a penny for thier thoughts they would make about $ 4.000 dollars a day .How cool is that? If any of you would like to see the daily journal website it is www.smdailyjournal.com Hope you all have a great Wednesday !!!!!!!!! Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

 

I got my hours back at work -Wahoo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi friends, hope you all had a good Monday.Work was pretty good today, it's starting to pick up a little and I am still waiting for us to get our Christmas cards in.I am going to be buying so many this year, lol.J-land is truly a wonderful place !!!!!!!! I am working 4 days this week, I am very happy about that !!!!!! I hate being off like 5 days in a row, I go crazy from boredom.I will be back at work tommorow and Wednesday as well.I am so glad to have my hours back, Last week I only worked two days and I was going stir-crazy here . I mean maybe I am weird but I hate when I am not working.I noticed today in the mall there were more people then usual for a Monday.Tis the season , lol.Back at work for me tommorow , Hope you all have a good Tuesday , thank you everyone for your comments, I would like to extend a warm welcome to a new reader I have Chrissie welcome aboard !!!!!!!!!!  , I love  meeting new readers :) I still ca'nt get over that duck incident yesterday, what a hoot , lol or more like a quack, , giggles.Love and Hugs Lisa XO

Christmas Cards

Hi friends, I will be sending out my Christmas cards soon, I have alot of your addresses already from the postcard swap so anybody who would like one from me who I do'nt have your address yet, email it to me and then I will make sure I get a card out to you,My store always gets awesome Christmas cards , Have a blessed day everyone, Love You All and Hugs Lisa

Flirting at the duck pond

Hi friends, I just wanted to share something funny that happened this morning.I went down to feed the ducks loaf of bread in hand, I had on old clothes, I had'nt washed my hair yet so I had it in a messy bun, I had my glasses on and some make-up .I thought I looked like the biggest nerd, but then this man was watching me feed the ducks and then starting flirting with me and asking for my phone number.  This man seemed nice enough , but he was old enough to be my father.He had some bread for the ducks as well and he had me pour it on the shore for them and I slipped on my ass and fell in the mud.Boy did I feel like an idiot!!!!!! Maybe girls covered in mud turn some guys on.I was like really come on.I told him I was very happily involved with someone and gave him a big smile and walked on.I thought the whole thing was hilarious.Oh by the way when I did shower later the nozzle to turn the water on in the shower broke off in my hand , how wonderful, lol.Just another thing to have fixed now.Hope you all had a good Sunday Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Sunday Thoughts

Hi friends, I was feeling a little weepy and emotional last night.I was watching a movie I rented last night with Jorja Fox in it called Memento.Ok I did'nt know she was killed in the movie so when I saw that I was horrified.I could'nt stop crying. Of course I was watching a music DVD of Sarah Brightman singing in Las Vegas last night and her beautiful, angelic voice made me cry as well.Mr Red is coming too so my emotions have been up and down for the last two days.Rain will be coming back this week around Tuesday.I really do'nt like the rain , it makes me depressed.I always think when it rains, our loved ones in heaven are crying and the rain is thier tears.I would like to wish my sweet friend "Amy" a very "Happy Birthday" today !!!!!!!!!! Amy I hope you have such a good day, you are a great friend !!!!!!!My friend Laura has a birthday coming up soon too on Tuesday.Hope you all have a good Sunday, I have so much to do today, Love You All Lisa

"Leave the city to get away from crime and guns fall out of the sky" Catherine Willows from the C.S.I. episode Homebodies

Surviving Childhood Abuse

Hi friends, I'm doing something a little different tonight and writing an essay on the after effects of child abuse.I hope maybe I can reach out and make some of you feel a little less alone as I release these words.I send hugs to anybody who has also suffered abuse as a child.

My dad never wanted to be a father.I had always sensed this .He was always angry and mean from the minute I entered the world on April 10,th 1976.I never remember him in a good day.The yelling, the verbal insults which struck me like little bullets, I knew my life was far from normal.I could'nt understand my friends who had perfect houses and they had loving fathers who were loving towards thier mothers and showered thier families with love.I was sad as a child , my mom bless her heart was wonderful.She is such a good mom.She was good to me .I could'nt understand why my dad was never around for any of my birthday parties as a child but I learned too soon he had pretty much dismissed me from the beginning.In his eyes I was worthless, a mistake, a letdown.The fact I had A.D.D. was another matter.It made me unexceptable and not worthy of his time or attention.My mom was my mom and dad.She got me tutors and fought for me.My dad just turned his back and ignored me except to insult me and make fun of me.One of his favorite things to do to me as a child was to take my beloved stuffed dog who I named He-Dog and throw him up in the hall closet .I would cry and beg him to get He-Dog back but he just laughed at my tears and walked away.My mom was the one who would climb up on a chair and get him back for me.

I hated the way my dad treated me.I was his scape-goat.An easy target to pick on.I was always the subject of his jokes or riducule.I wanted to die , my mom was the one who always stuck up for me and yelled at his sorry ass.When I was 9 I was playing with my childhood friend Linda when her Grandfather talked me into going into his bedroom and put his hands down my pants and under my shirt.I was just so scared and so frightened .I told nobody of what happened. I buried the secret like a dog buries a bone in the backyard.I made up excuses from then on when Linda wanted to play with me.It was such a difficult thing to absorb.I felt more alone then ever.

I do feel a void sometimes in my life when I am in the store working and a daughter and a father come in and are laughing together and enjoying each other's company.I feel a stabbing pain in my chest and the pain is very , very real.I have tried to forgot my dad and move on with my life but I do think back all the time and it makes me sad.I ca'nt see things ever being good between us as long as I live.I truly feel so sad for anybody who has ever been abused or molested.It's a club that few would ever want to join or be a part of.Thank you for listening to me rant.I send big hugs and love to all of my awesome friends.I love you all for understanding me and loving me even though I am flawed but I promise I am a good person.Love You All Lisa XO

Thursday Thoughts

Hi friends, is'nt this color beautiful ? Hope you all had a good Thursday.Mine was ok, the weather was icky here today, cold and wet and depressing.I went to Costco to do a little shopping, I love that place and in 12 more days I will be rushing there to buy the 6'th Season of C.S.I. on DVD.I ca'nt wait to get it !!!!!!! As I was leaving to go to Costco this morning I saw down below in the lobby one of my neighbor's cat's is missing.Please pray he comes home.He is an adorable cat too !!!!!!!!!! I know I would be a big crying wreck if my big fat, furry diva went missing.He is my love.I love my cat.I would never want to imagine what it would be like if he was missing.I went to work-out for 50 minutes earlier, yea me, lol.Hope you all have a good night, it's CSI night -woo-hoo !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hope you all have a good Friday, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO

Fun at the dentist

Hi friends, this morning I went back to the dentist to have that tooth looked at again that has been bothering me.My dentist looked at it and X-rayed the tooth and she filed it down a little too.She told me that if the tooth still gives me pain after a week I may need a root canal.Oh joy, lol.I am feeling a little sick and nauseous now, I think whatever she numbed my mouth with before she took the X-rays made me have a headache.At least I have an answer about my tooth for now.Lisa Jo there is another letter coming for you with more eye-candy inside so be looking for it soon.Tommorow night is a new CSI !!!!! Yea I ca'nt wait.Also for all of you CSI fans I ca'nt say enough about that new CSI book I bought Monday.I love it !!!!!!!!!!!! Hope you all have a good Thursday tommorow, Love You All and Hugs Lisa XO P.S. Hope you all had a fun Halloween :)